Shooting a short... With all of you?

**assyrix** · January 4th, 2006, 02:42 PM

Download Link at File Factory

Size 36.4 MB so be warned...

If anybody ever again says the word "Helpless" in my vicinity I shall strangle them without warning.

**eddie123456789** · January 4th, 2006, 03:31 PM

hello!

congratulations!
2 quick comments:

Good: Thought the acting, lighting and music were
great.

Bad: Would have enjoyed more close ups. In fact - any close ups! Felt a bit too long. Perhaps its not web friendly? Sound seemed to go up and down a little?

Otherwise its frickin genius.

**emjen** · January 4th, 2006, 07:13 PM

I agree with Christian, some of the cutting was off, the talking to themselves seemed rehearsed, the argueing in the kitchen would've gone better if either the guy or the woman (especially the guy though) would be doing something at the sime time as well. I think I saw some low angles but didn't really see the point (the most obvious one was to give 'power' but power was in this case givin to the man, who was the one with the least power in the argument).

**miker** · January 4th, 2006, 10:02 PM

congratulations. making a good movie is hard work. making a shitty movie is hard work.

i don't think the talking-to-themselves lines were that jarring at all, but i did find the footsteps on the stairs jarring and the dialogue audio as a whole was bloody awful. i don't know if that clipping is on your source, but it's really apparent on the download.

music - didn't notice it much. that's probably a good sign.

acting - par for the course i reckon. not terrible, but not amazing either. i don't know if you shot it in order, but the guy seemed to get better as time went on in the movie.

lighting - the first thing that struck me was that the image looked clean and richly coloured and, for the most part, well (if unimaginatively) lit.

composition - didn't like the framing at all. it's subjective and i'm a picky asshole.

editing - adequate and mostly unobtrusive.

story - incredibly dull IMO. no drama, no tension, no humour. i don't know what i'm supposed to think other than "that homeless chick is quite good looking at this frame size" and "i see cleavage" on the black girl. i have no idea what the story was about other than a couple of dipsticks trying to make a phonecall about a broken lock to keep an attractive girl out of the flat. they must've both been post-grads cos they were so frickin clueless! should've made it about the sexual tensions of FFM threesomes ... the proper order, best positions etc.

rated:
imagephp?typeimage&amppartner id234320&ampproduct id2529578&ampimg id1&ampsizehuge&ampbgcolor imageswhite

imagephp?typeimage&amppartner id234320&ampproduct id2529578&ampimg id1&ampsizehuge&ampbgcolor imageswhite

i don't mean to sound negative. but i guess i just did. [img]redface.gif[/img]

on one level though, i think it's really good in terms of actually having accomplished something .... i think it would be great to build upon this type of collaborative working and make it some sort of annual event?

**richard.fisher** · January 5th, 2006, 12:38 AM

sorry to be a nuisance (sp?) but what codec was it encoded with? I formated my HD last weekend, so need to install all the codecs over again. Cheers.

p.s. really looking forward to seeing it.

**emjen** · January 5th, 2006, 04:19 AM

I like the ethics, and the screenplay. The girl acted pretty good, the guy acted pretty shitty. I like some of the choices made in the direction, then again, I think some of the made choices weren't that right at all. I liked the music. I hate file factory, even though it did provide me with Maximshoot video's while I was waiting for the download to finish. I didn't like the lightning in the hallway coming from the floor.

**Patriarch** · January 5th, 2006, 04:42 AM

Originally posted by emjen:
I like the ethics, and the screenplay. The girl acted pretty good, the guy acted pretty shitty. I like some of the choices made in the direction, then again, I think some of the made choices weren't that right at all. I liked the music. I hate file factory, even though it did provide me with Maximshoot video's while I was waiting for the download to finish. I didn't like the lightning in the hallway coming from the floor.

I concur... I might have trimmed some of the editing the make the dialogue have a better flow. For instance there is a scene in the hall way where there is a cut each time one of them starts their dialogue. Hving some cuts with reactions, and cutting mid sentance would help the flow and be a more elegant way of doing it.

Also (script I guess) - having characters talk to themselves must be done slighly nore subtle. First he speaks out "I dont have time for this" (after looking at his watch) and then the next scene him taps all over his pockets and utters "Oh I forgot the keys" - something like that. Its a bit too much for my sensibilities.

**twister!** · January 5th, 2006, 08:00 AM

I've got QT 7.03 and get the audio but no picture....

**assyrix** · January 5th, 2006, 08:57 AM

Originally posted by richard.fisher:
what codec was it encoded with?

I used DiVX 3.11 alpha for the video and the Radium MP3 codec for the audio. Windows users can install ffdshow to view this and many other formats without having to install dodgy codecs.

Thanks for all your comments and criticism. The story was deliberately kept simple as the aim was to demonstrate that people from this board can actually put something together (which was difficult enough) and not just talk about it.

Shooting took a day, as did the visual edit. Audio took a week. We shot the film before radio mics and Pro Tools arrived hence the trouble with the soundtrack (which might also be due to the compression).

The footsteps sound off because the guy forgot his shoes and had to borrow mine which were two sizes too big. The kitchen scenes were shot last hence the actors getting better as we go along.

The cute girl and the cleavage were, of course, entirely deliberate.

[ January 05, 2006 05:01 AM: Message edited by: assyrix ]